Friday, March 25, 2011


I received an email today that is going to be the topic of today's post. My brother sent me the email, and he had added a note that yes, this was his niece (his wife's sister's daughter). I called him and asked him if he could get their permission to post the picture on my blog entry for today, because I have never seen anything so beautiful in all of my life!

When I talked to my brother after he talked to his brother-in-law, he told me he was surprised to find out that it is not his niece! This is an email that was actually forwarded to his brother-in-law. They are all amazed at how much like this little girl my brother's niece actually looks.

So, I am going to post the picture, as the note at the bottom of the page says to forward to your friends. If the parents of this child sees the picture and would like it to be removed, please let me know. I would never want to offend them in any ways.

So, before I go any further, here is the email text, as well as the picture, of the original email I was sent:

Matthew 18:20
For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.


Yes, this most definitely counts, sweetheart!

This little girl understands more than most adults do. While I believe that it is imperative and very beneficial to read, study, disect, meditate and analyze Scripture to grow in our faith, walk and understanding of God, I beleive that a lot of times our analyzing gets in the way of the true heart of the matter. As my husband has said before, too often, the most "intellectual" of minds have absolutely no faith in God because He cannot be explained. Faith is believing in the unseen.

Thursday, March 24, 2011


This time of the year is extremely special to me. On February 25, 2004, a movie was released that reaches down into the very depths of my soul. While I know the story well, I've never seen it depicted in this exact way.

The movie I am referring to is, "The Passion Of The Christ".

Within the first month after the movie was released, my husband and I went to the theatre 7 times to see it. At the time, we were Youth Leaders at our church. Since the movie was rated "R" due to the extreme violence depicted, we were required to view the movie before taking students to see it. For the students to see the movie their parents had to sign a permission form, for the exact same reason.

I was raised in a Christian home. I often joke that I went to church before I entered the world, and started my entry into the world at church! My Mom actually went into labor during the Sunday night service. A funny side story here that my mom loves to tell. She went to the restroom, and her water broke. Obviously, she had to send someone in to get my Dad.

My grandparents, as well as a couple of my aunts and uncles went to the same church. My Dad sent one of the ushers in to let my grandparents know what was going on. It was at this very moment that the congregation was sitting, and the choir was getting ready to sing. My grandfather did not realize what was going on, so he was standing up, in the middle of the church, looking at my aunt, who was in the choir, shaking his head "yes" So this is how the congregation knew I was ready to make my entrance into the world!

Well, I've gotten a bit off track here. But, the point of telling this funny little tidbit of my life is to say that yes, I attended church regularly as a child. When the church doors were open, we were there. I knew the words of the old hymns by heart. In fact, I was even known to give a concert for my grandparents at the drop of a hat! There are even pictures of the performances, my "brush microphone" in hand.

Even if you are not a church-goer, it's quite likely you know the words to the ever-famous hymn, "Amazing Grace." In fact, there is now even a movie of how the hymn came to be. This was one of the songs that I loved to sing the most.

Strangely enough, though I have known the words of "Amazing Grace"  by heart pretty much since I uttered my first words, It was not until I was 31-years-old that I truly grasped the true meaning of this beautiful hymn.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011


After my first husband committed suicide, my life as I knew it literally ceased to exist. Everything that I knew, believed and lived shattered into a million pieces. It was at this point that God lovingly picked up one, single piece of my shattered, brokenness and placed it in the middle of His canvas, which is my life.

All of the shattered pieces of my former life are still there today. While it may not appear that way, the shattered, broken pieces have been lovingly healed and mended by the hands of The Master Who created me and loves me so dearly. Many, many pieces have been loving placed where they belong, and yet, many others still are in the process of mending and healing.

One thing that God showed me, after my husband died, was how yes, we are indeed created in the image of God. However, as humans, most everything we do is opposite of the way God does things. It is a strange concept, in one sense. Yet, it makes perfect sense as well.

An image is a reflection of an actual thing, not the thing itself. When you look in the mirror at yourself, it is the opposite of reality. Your right side appears to be the left side, and vice versa.

When you work a puzzle, what is the first thing that you do? You start with the outside pieces, and put the entire border together. At least, this is the way I do it, and this is the way I've seen most people work a puzzle.

God began to show me that my life is a puzzle in progress at the work of His loving hands.

Tuesday, March 22, 2011


There is nothing more in this world that I detest more than lying! I have seen the affects of lying in my life, personally. It literally almost destroyed me.

Unfortunately, by nature, I am a "sneaky, manipulative" person. It has taken me many years to be able to acknowledge this, but as Dr. Phil says, "You can't change what you don't acknowledge!"

While this is my nature, this is no longer the person I am. Many years ago, I was faced with the reality of what my lies were doing to myself. At this point I am not going to even talk about how it affected other people in my life- I think that is a given, and understood by most everyone who is reading this blog.

However, what most of us fail to realize is how our actions affect us. For every action there is a consequence, good or bad.

As a child, I was very "sneaky". Unfortunately, I was good enough at it that I got away with a lot of things that were dangerous. If I had not been so good at sneaking around, maybe I would have been caught at the harmless things as a child, and it would have taught me not to be so sneaky, and this may have prevented me from putting myself in so many dangerous situations. Many of these dangerous situations have harmed me, and some still have lasting affects on my life today.

Being sneaky goes hand-in-hand with lying. It is basically the opposite side of the same coin. While you may not be out-right lying about a situation, if you are not being completely truthful, or you are trying to hide things, you are being dishonest.

Monday, March 21, 2011


"Aye, fight and you may die. Run, and you'll live... at least a while. And dying in your beds, many years from now, would you be willin' to trade ALL the days, from this day to that, for one chance, just one chance, to come back here and tell our enemies that they may take our lives, but they'll never take... OUR FREEDOM!" 
~ William Wallace ~

Last night, I watched one of my all-time favorite movies. It's been a long while since I've watched it, but I happened to be flipping through the channels and saw it was on. What a perfect time in history for me to be reminded of the bravery of William Wallace.

Obviously, I am talking about the Mel Gibson movie, "Braveheart".

If you have never seen this movie, I definitely recommend it!

Though this is a "fictional representation" of history, it is based on the life of a real man in 13th Century Scotland. I won't give a synopsis of the movie here, because I do not want to ruin the movie if you have not seen it; and if you have seen it, you know the intricate beauty that it encompasses.

There are many, many aspects of this movie that draws me in. Number one, I love history. Number two, I am a hopeless romantic at heart. Number three, the fight for freedom is in my blood. I guess in reality, the number three reason should be my number one reason.

Without freedom, we are truly slaves. This seems to be a given, but it amazes me how this is not obvious to the masses. It's strangely eerie how so many aspects of this movie can be applied to current day affairs. Change the setting and the characters, and you have the exact same scenario today, in modern day America.

Sunday, March 20, 2011


As I've thought over my previous post, I am reminded of an old Kenny Rogers song, "The Gambler". I'm sure that if you've read my previous post you are wondering how in the world this song comes to mind. The post has nothing at all to do with gambling, playing cards, or anything that entails.

However, the course speaks volumes for me, in my life:

You've got to know when to hold 'em
Know when to fold 'em
Know when to walk away
Know when to run
You never count your money
When you're sittin' at the table
There'll be time enough for countin'
When the dealin's done

Now, one thing you will learn about me is that I march to the beat of a different drummer. I've always been this way! In fact, I grew up in the '80's and was always known for wearing a "different style" of clothes... and this is in the '80's, when "different" WAS the style!

Maybe the reason this chorus reverberates over and over in my mind as I look back over my life experiences is because so much of the time I did not know when to hold 'em, fold 'em, walk away, or run. So much of my life I have made the wrong decision, no matter what decision I made.


"A leader takes people where they want to go. A great leader takes people where they don't necessarily want to go, but ought to go."   Unknown
I found this quote today on a graphic as I was doing research for another project I am working on. I tweeted it out, because it really hit home to me.
Before I became a mommy, I was on staff at our church in the Youth Department. I was basically the female Youth Pastor, though I did not have the official title.
I will try to keep my "church history" as brief as possible, because that's not what this post is about. However, I do believe it is important to set up my thought process in all of this.
I was raised in a very legalistic church. My brother and I were both known as the "black sheep" of the church because our parents raised us to make our own decisions, not just follow along.
When I was 14-years-old I was sexually assaulted. As a very naive' 14-year-old, I was totally shocked, not only at what had happened, but that it was even possible. This event sent me on a downward spiral that would last a decade and a half or so.