Tuesday, March 22, 2011


There is nothing more in this world that I detest more than lying! I have seen the affects of lying in my life, personally. It literally almost destroyed me.

Unfortunately, by nature, I am a "sneaky, manipulative" person. It has taken me many years to be able to acknowledge this, but as Dr. Phil says, "You can't change what you don't acknowledge!"

While this is my nature, this is no longer the person I am. Many years ago, I was faced with the reality of what my lies were doing to myself. At this point I am not going to even talk about how it affected other people in my life- I think that is a given, and understood by most everyone who is reading this blog.

However, what most of us fail to realize is how our actions affect us. For every action there is a consequence, good or bad.

As a child, I was very "sneaky". Unfortunately, I was good enough at it that I got away with a lot of things that were dangerous. If I had not been so good at sneaking around, maybe I would have been caught at the harmless things as a child, and it would have taught me not to be so sneaky, and this may have prevented me from putting myself in so many dangerous situations. Many of these dangerous situations have harmed me, and some still have lasting affects on my life today.

Being sneaky goes hand-in-hand with lying. It is basically the opposite side of the same coin. While you may not be out-right lying about a situation, if you are not being completely truthful, or you are trying to hide things, you are being dishonest.

Things intensified for me when I put my running shoes on and started running from God. The further away from God I ran, the more I lied. The strange thing is- yes, I lied to others- but things had morphed so out of control that I was lying to myself.

You are probably asking, "How can you lie to yourself? You know deep down inside what the truth is, even if you are not speaking it."

Yes, this is true- for a while. But over time, if you continue the habit of lying, you start believing your own lies.

Some time before my first husband committed suicide, I began to seek out God once again. Because I still had a huge misunderstanding of Who He Is, I did not find His grace that He wants all of us to know and love.

Remember- if we are a child of God's, no matter how far and long we run, He will never stop pursuing us. He never leaves us- we leave Him. However, in His infinite love and beauty, He is still there protecting us all along the way. My life is an extreme example of this.

I had been lying for so long I could not tell the truth from a lie. Many stories that I had told for years were "vivid memories" in my mind. I could tell the story the same way time and time again. I had begun to believe my lies. My lies became my reality.

When you realize that you do not know what the truth is in your own life, it is one of the scariest places you can be. I spent countless hours alone with God, begging for His forgiveness, and asking Him to show me the truth in every lie that I had told.

God answers all of our prayers. We may not believe that He answers them, but sometimes His answer is no. Other times His answer is not now, be patient. And sometimes His answer is yes.

When you ask God for righteousness, His answer is going to be yes. His answer to my prayer was very painful in many ways, but it was exactly what had to happen in my life if I was ever going to be healed completely. Lies are nothing but festering wounds of infection. If you do not rid your life of lies you are filled with infection. If you live your life caught in a web of lies you are not living a life of wellness.

There have been many times that I would be in the middle of telling a story that I had told for years, and God would stop me in the middle of my conversation. This only happened with people whom I love, and who love me, and knew what was going on in my life. I had warned several people in my life that if I suddenly stop in the middle of a story, God is talking to me, and I have to listen and make it right.

I believe because I sought to know and speak only the truth in my life, God blessed me by revealing the lies that I had told over the years.

Now, I cannot stand to be around someone who lies. As a mother, this is a huge challenge for me, in teaching my children not to lie. As with all kids, they lie to get out of trouble. It is a challenge for me to remember this, and all the while teach them the importance of telling the truth.

I am very honest with my children, and have told them how my lies almost destroyed me. Things literally got to the point where I was destroying every part of my life because of my lies.

Your word is all you have. If you do not speak the truth, people recognize this. All the riches and fame in the world are nothing without your word of truth. Maybe all people do not recognize it, but people who seek God and seek to know the truth will recognize your lies. Many, many people in my life realized that they could not believe anything I said.

Thankfully, this is my past. Now I live only for truth. Lies are straight from the pits of hell. Satan is the Father of all lies.

Lord God, I pray that this nation will wake up to the truth of what is going on. Too many people are not paying attention.

I pray for the truth to prevail overwhelmingly with Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords. I do not for one minute believe Jared Loughner is NOT mentally capable to stand trial! I pray that the truth will prevail, that justice will be done, and he will receive just punishment for his assault on so many people. I continue to pray for Congresswoman Giffords health and recovery. Bless her and keep her, as well as her husband, Mark Kelly.

I pray that where there are lies, You will reveal all truth.

I pray these things in Your precious Name, Jesus- The Way, The TRUTH, and The Life! Amen!

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